literature

You Said You Liked Poetry

Deviation Actions

RunningHair's avatar
By
Published:
153 Views

Literature Text

I've never been good at
doing things like this,
but give it strong thought.
I didn't have anything planned
for this moment,
so excuse me if I
go on the fly
in saying what I
got to say.

You said you liked poetry.

Do you like metaphors?
I sure do.
Metaphors are the
power chords of poetry
if done correctly.
What? Why the weird look?
You like poetry, right?
You told me you did...

Your love would be
an injection,
straight in the vein,
with my arm tied
with laces of
love and respect
tied in a knot of
trust.
I can feel you
roar in my veins
in the fashion
the worst storms wished
they could produce.
You reach my head
and I'm done.
TKO.

Maybe that metaphor was
kinda sketchy? Hmm, injections are weird.
I hate needles. You did? Thought so.
Damn, I'm fuckin' up;
How about similes?
Those things are fuckin' cool, right?
Try this one for size:

You are like the sweetest
smoke being inhaled -
the type of smoke
that settles inside,
caressing my blood stream,
reaching as far up
into my eyes,
bloodshot.

Shit, that was weird.
You say no? Nah, you're being nice.
I feel like I'm embarrassing myself.
You sure? OK.

So, how was that?
What? I could do better?
But, how? I mean, how?
Tell it like it is, you say?
Like the shit Aaron Neville
used to sing back in the day
before he started doing Christmas songs?
Umm, fuuuuuuuck,
Fuck it, I'll do it live...

(inhale, exhale)

I kinda like you,
but I can't find a
good way to tell you
without freaking you out.

Please forgive me.

Well, after all
you said
you liked poetry,
right?
Some random ass on-the-fly shit I did. Not sure what's up with the slightly romantic mood.

Try to picture this being read out loud in a typical nerd lisp/accent. That is how this piece should be read. LOL
© 2012 - 2024 RunningHair
Comments4
Join the community to add your comment. Already a deviant? Log In
ThatFunnierPiece's avatar
It's interesting. Being a nerd myself, I found the character a bit too self-confident in parts where s/he isn't being lyrical. Other than that, I like the shifts in the mood, the atmosphere of anxiety and awkwardness. It does leave quite an impression, and it being slightly romantic actually helps it a great deal.
Still, I don't like the poem's description. After philosophical stimulation you slammed me full-speed into a concrete wall. It does separate you from the poem's character, though.